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    Categories: Humor

What’s the Best (or Worst) Porsche Pick-up Line You Know?

I forget what silly reality TV show I was watching when I heard the line, “Wow! What a coincidence, your eyes are the same color as my Porsche!” Thinking back I’m pretty sure the line was followed by the sound of someone choking on their beer while simultaneously invoking the universally known posture of “talk to the hand”. I’m fairly certain this little scene involved someone named “The Situation” and possibly a girl called “Shnooky” but I might be mistaken. If you’re not familiar with these cultural references, don’t worry, you’re probably better off not knowing.

After dredging up memories nightmares of Joey Carrera (and friends), I started wondering, just how many ways has Porsche been worked into pick-up lines. A little Google research and before you could say “single for life” I had a short list of Porsche related pick-up lines. I present them here for you to do with them as you will. However, be warned, I make no guarantees that these lines will work for you. In fact, if you are daring stupid enough to use them, I would suggest bringing a dry shirt to change into after the recipient of said line chokes on their drink and spits it out all over you.

Porsche Pick-up Lines

  • Social work is such a meaningful worthwhile work that I’ve decided to sell my Porsche and give up my lucrative law practice to join you!
  • Pardon me, do you have room in your purse for the keys to my Porsche?
  • Excuse me, but could I borrow your cell phone? I locked mine in my Porsche along with my Olympic Gold Medal, and I need to call my helicopter pilot to come pick me up.
  • It’s a good thing I’ve got a Porsche, ’cause you’ve got some dangerous curves.
  • While more of a pick-up “technique” vs. “line”, this one comes from some resourceful desperate soul on the internet: I would park outside a club and once I started to chat up some worthy woman, I would reach in my pocket and hit the panic button on my alarm remote. I would do this several times over the course of several minutes. Before long someone from outside would come in and tell the DJ. The DJ would of course announce, “Does anyone here own a Porsche Turbo? Your alarm keeps going off.” Having not mentioned my car to the woman I was talking to, I would turn and say, “That sounds like my car.” Without fail, the women would respond, “You own a Porsche?”…

Are there more Porsche Pick-up Lines Floating Around?

The lines and stories above are what my exhaustive and scientific research found. Do you know of any others? Better yet, have you ever used one? If so, we want to hear your story. 🙂

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